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Sunday, 30 October 2005 at 12.45 / 823

Hot lesbian action —

Several days ago, the Internet connection at the office went on the blink from 14.00. We lodged a fault with the local telephone monopoly, which, surprisingly, had not caused any improvement by the time of my arrival the next morning at 8.00. With my ability to work crippled, I set myself to a game of Spider Solitaire, which I won handily.

Basking in my victory, I leant back in my chair, put my feet up on my desk, and began idly rummaging through my wallet. I was examining my driving licence when I noticed a very odd thing: my licence said that I was female!

I promptly showed several people my erroneous licence to great amusement.

I then realised that this was a potentially grave situation. I believed that, at least in Illinois, having false/old/wrong information on one's driving licence was at least sometimes an engaolable offence. Since I had nothing to do at the office, I decided to strike out immediately to put to rights my gender (in the personal sense) in the eyes of the people of Minnesota.

In spite of naïvely assuming that I could just present myself at the licencing bureau, lower my trousers, and say, ‘Behold!’ I was informed by the information gentleman that they should require a copy of my original licence application or my birth certificate. I remembered shredding the copy of the application months ago. (It was later found to be hiding in the treacherous depths of my car's glove compartment.) My birth certificate was in a safe deposit box miles away, and I wasn't totally certain at which bank it was since I hadn't been there in over a year. After a journey home, maps were consulted, my birth certificate was obtained, and I trundled back to the licencing bureau. I joined the queue and waited until my turn.

Me. Hi, my driving licence says I'm female.
Driving Licensor. Oh, that's a problem. Let me see the new application you have there....And let me see your licence. [She photocopies it, and then speaks with finality.] Okay.
Me. ‘Okay’? That's it?
Driving Licensor. Yup.
Me. You don't need anything else? No...birth certificate...or anything?
Driving Licensor. Nope.
[Above my head, a bubble containing storm clouds appears. Exeunt.]

I've since received a correctly engendered licence in the post, thus bringing to an end Sara's and my time of living as lesbians.




The title of this entry will cause your google page ranking to skyrocket. Perhaps the information gentleman was confused and thought you were following the procedure a transgendered person must adhere to when changing gender designation on identification, which involves birth certificate and documentation from therapist, among other things. Have you verified the gender field on Sara's licence? Maybe your correction changed you two from straight to gay.

by Ralph Warren Siegler on 31 Oct 2005 at 21.14 / 176


This has nothing to do with your topic - but I just realized something: you and Ben were quite ahead of your time with Urbaign Conversation, given the current podcasting craze.

by Jared Seehafer on 6 Dec 2005 at 17.08 / 005


Indeed! This occurred to me as well when I was looking back over some older entries. I'll try to do my part to stay on the bleeding edge over here....

by Sidney Cammeresi on 8 Dec 2005 at 11.05 / 753


It's too bad you didn't get married as legal lesbians, that would have been fun.

by dbt on 17 Jan 2006 at 20.22 / 140




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